Efigenia Pacey was born in Bogota, Colombia, on March 1, 1939 to Ana Joaquina Acosta de Neme. At a young age, she was known throughout the country as a gifted singer and later was crowned Miss Colombia at the 1964 Pan American Week.
She followed her cousins to Los Angeles in the mid-sixties where she met and was courted by Michael Pacey. They fell in love, married, and moved to Winnipeg to start a family. It was there that their son, Robert and daughter, Ana Jean (AJ) were both born.
In the seventies, Effie and Michael moved to Vancouver where Effie began a long and successful career in banking and teaching. She taught night school at John Oliver while working at the Royal Bank, and retired from Citizen’s Trust in 2005
Efigenia passed away peacefully from leukemia on Friday, August 27 at the North Shore Hospice with her daughter at her side. She is survived by her loving husband of 55 years, Michael; son, Robert and his wife, Diane; daughter, AJ and her husband, Daved; and their adored grandchildren, Ty and Addy.
“Rest In Peace, Mamita. You are loved by countless people and will be sorely missed.”
Efigenia Pacey Eulogy
Efigenia’s eulogy was given by her daughter Ana Jean Benefield and her son Robert Manuel Pacey at her funeral mass on Friday, September 10, 2021 at St. Stephen’s Parish in North Vancouver, BC.
We’d like to begin by thanking everyone for coming here today to celebrate our mother, Efigenia Pacey.
You may know her as Effie or Eff, and some of you were lucky enough to know her as Ita, but we all knew her as a “fosforito” , or match stick, but more on that later.
We know that Mom is here with us today because there is no way she would miss this many people getting together just for her! So as we tell her tale, please allow yourself to feel her presence and enjoy it.
Our mother was born in small rural suburb of Bogota Colombia to our abuelitos Domingo and Ana Joaquina. She was one of five siblings that included sisters Bernarda and Etelvina and brothers Efrain and Hernando. Her personality was galvanized in her early years as she simultaneously fought and followed the Latin American traditions of her family. She was a good student who longed for more and secretly entered singing contests and beauty pageants. It will come as no surprise to you to discover that she won most of those contests and it was the prize money that helped her help your brothers through school and led to her leaving the country and finding a new life.
In 1964, at the Pan American Week, she was crowned Miss Colombia and shortly after, when her Father passed, she decided to leave Colombia. She followed her cousins, our loving Tios and crazy Tias, to Los Angeles – to a new life. It was there, while working as a file clerk in California Land Title, that she spied the man of her dreams. “That is the man I will marry,” she told her friends. That man was my Father. Dad was on the first leg of a world tour that so far had taken him from Winnipeg to Los Angeles. Mom ended that world tour fast.
Mom and Dad married the first time (they were married FOUR times!), in 1966, in Las Vegas. Dad wants you to know that it was at City Hall, and not a casino, and were serenaded by Andy Williams himself! (Ask Dad about it later:)
Shortly after they were married, Mom became increasingly worried about the FBI coming to force Dad to fight in Vietnam. Yes, they dodged the draft and moved Winnipeg to live with Dad’s mother Jean Pacey, our nana, who had also taken in Dad’s brother Rick and his wife Lee.
Our Uncle Rick is recently deceased and is no doubt also here with us as he loved a family gathering, and rum and coke, as much as mom.
Mom and Dad lived in Winnipeg for 3 years at which point Mom realized that the snow came every year so they moved back to Los Angeles. It wasn’t long before they headed to Canada again, to Vancouver, to raise their two young children. Us. Robert and Ana Jean.
With Michael launching his design career, Mamita tasked herself to adapt to a new culture and to raise us. Of the many things that mamita was good at, motherhood was no doubt her forte. As a mother she was generous, selfless, loving, fiercely proud and involved. She worked nights so that she was there to raise us and not “have us raised by stranger”.
She showered us with affection and always kissed us. From an early age we were given affection regardless of where we were (and who was laughing at us) and that never changed.
She was fierce and didn’t let anyone push her around. She was a “fosforito”: She wasn’t afraid of anyone or anything and wouldn’t allow us to be either. I remembers rushing home to hide from the neighbourhood bullies only to be stopped at the door and sent back out to show them that “you are not afraid.”
She was proud of her culture and instilled that love in us from an early age. We were encouraged to dance traditional Colombian dances and even performed at the Queen Elizabeth at her prompting. We both have memories of learning how to conjugate Spanish verbs at the kitchen table at the apartment on Broughton Street, and many memories of Colombian Day parties and celebrations.
She was savvy. Mamita’s banking skills allowed us to buy a home on the North Shore where my sister and I were raised until we moved out as adults. According to Dad we’d still be living in our apartment on Broughton Street if it wasn’t for her.
Mamita was practicing Roman Catholic and active throughout her life in her both her parishes, Guardian Angels in the West End and St Stephen’s.
Mamita was also a loving spouse. When they were first married, mamita used to iron Dad’s socks and underwear. Who does that? She was the seamstress, the cook, the cheerleader and the ultimate partner. Their love withstood prejudice and difficulties and on May 28th, of this year, Mom and Dad celebrated their 55th wedding anniversary. Their love is an inspiration to both of us.
Mamita was not defined by her jobs but she was a consummate professional. It was always about her clients and how she could help them. This made her a successful banker for the many years she worked for the Royal Bank and eventually retired from Citizen’s Bank in 2005.
Mamita was afforded another opportunity to love unconditionally, with the birth of her grandchildren Ty and Addyson. She took an early retirement just so that she could take full-time care of Ty and then Addy. She became super “Ita” or super grandma and she was there for each of their special moments, every important game, just as she had been with us.
But Mamita’s retirement wasn’t all about the grandchildren. Mom’s found a new “HOBBY” had her return full circle to the casino but this time as an aficionado of black jack. For years we listened to her tell us how she never lost and how she always came home “with their money” in her pockets. We can now confirm that she was a genuine card shark:)
In December of 2020 our Mamita was again diagnosed with cancer. In the mid 1970’s she had faced and beat stomach cancer, but this time it was advanced leukaemia. Soon after her diagnosis she was moved to the North Shore Hospice where she was given a grim diagnosis. You know Effie though. She was a warrior and she wanted more time with the family so it wasn’t long before she defied the odds and was “kicked out” of the Hospice for being too healthy.
Mamita moved back home in April and thrived in the care of my Dad with visits from family and friends filling her days. We secretly hoped that the leukaemia was in remission and took advantage of the time we were blessed with.
Unfortunately, two recent quick infections took their toll on her and on August 17th she was admitted to hospital and shortly after to the North Shore Hospice again. She passed quietly in her sleep on Friday, August 27th with my amazing sister at her side.
The world is a different place without our Mamita in it but she’s not gone altogether. She lives on in the memories and stories that each of us carry in us. She lives on in the people that we have become.
Te quiero mamita.
Mas que mucho.
